Air Force Hymn

Listen here

United States Air Force Hymn
 
Lord, guard and guide the men who fly
Through the great spaces of the sky;
Be with them traversing the air
In darkening storms or sunshine fair  
 
Thou who dost keep with tender might
The balanced birds in all their flight
Thou of the tempered winds be near
That, having thee, they know no fear  
 
Control their minds with instinct fit
What time, adventuring, they quit
The firm security of land;
Grant steadfast eye and skillful hand  
 
Aloft in solitudes of space,
Uphold them with Thy saving grace.
O God, protect the men who fly
Thru lonely ways beneath the sky.  
 
Amen

My thankful list

Apples, almonds, and apricots
Baby Mine, blankets on a cold night, books, and broccoli casserole
Cookies, cake, chocolate, and cream for my pumpkin pie
Dreams, dear ones
Eddybody I love 
Flowers, flannel sheets, and forgiveness
Good nights, grandparents, and gravy on my potatoes
Home, hugs, and happiness
Ice cream
Just about any kind of Jell-O
King-size beds, kids to snuggle with, and kisses
Love and laughing
My sweet little Marshmallow, mushrooms, and memories of Mom and Dad
Naps, nieces and nephews, and good news
Old friends
Potatoes (mashed), pie (pumpkin), Priority Mail to the Persian Gulf,
     and Pippi Longstocking
Quiet moments wrapped in a quilt
Rain and a roof to keep me dry
Sleeping in, long hot showers, singing, sunshine, smiles,
     and stuffing with celery and onions
Turkey on the Thanksgiving table
Uncles (and aunts and cousins)
Vacations, Vernors ginger ale, and my van when it’s not in the shop
Wonderful words, water for drinking, warm woolies, and wishes that come true
Xs and Os
Yes dears
Zippers that keep my coats together (and you, who keep me warm inside)

This is for Laura. I am also thankful for my brothers and sisters, and that includes you.

Will you please let me brush your teeth?

No, no, not yours. I’m talking to the three-year-old.

She doesn’t like a toothbrushing. Over the years, I have thunk up lots of tricks for getting a toothbrush in her mouth long enough to…oops, time’s up. She’s off.

First, I tried the usual: reasoning, begging, explaining, citing the Dental Authorities, pretending the toothbrush was an airplane, holding her in various wrestling holds and making a swipe with the brush every time she opened her mouth to howl. Then I decided  to get creative.

So I devised the three-toothbrush method. One brush for her right hand (because she wants to do the brushing, see), one brush for me, and and another brush for her left hand (because if she has a hand free, she will grab mine). Every now and then I could get my brush into her mouth and scrub. That worked for, maybe, two days.

Then I went to the “I’ll brush yours and you brush mine” version. Which works just how it sounds. I got a taste of why kids don’t like getting their teeth brushed by other people–gag, gag. This was good entertainment for about three days. But my kids are too clever to be fooled for long.

Let’s try another tactic. Oh! Let’s see if we can see the candy you ate today in there–oh yes! There it is! (Brush, brush.) Oh, I see some milk! Did you have ice cream? Oh, yes, there it is! Let’s get that peanut butter sandwich! Uh, ho, I see some cake. (Brush, brush.) And so on, and so on. That was a good game for–what was it–four times?

But NOW, I’m sure I have a winner. You know how you’re supposed to brush for about three minutes or so. Well, you can time it by singing a song. Of course she’d like me to sing to her! And sure enough, as I brushed and sang “Happy Birthday to you” a couple of times, added a modern new twist for a third verse, and wound up with one last round of “Happy Birthday,” she sat, rapt, mouth open, never once complaining. Yay-hoo! I never in her whole entire life have brushed her teeth so long. Last night the song was “A You’re Adorable.” I can think of endless variations on this theme.  And I am going to ignore the fact that her attention was flagging already after the second night of it. I love this game.

Date night

This is big news. I am excited. I am trying hard to restrain myself, thus the deliberate non-use of exclamation marks. Daddy-O and I are going on a date tonight. We might even leave Baby home. I will do a bit of shopping, Daddy-O will hang out in Electronics or Books, and then we will go to Applebee’s for half-price appetizers.

Speaking of half-price appetizers…(My Dear College Daughter Who Has Had It Up To Here With Ellipses, if you’re reading this, that ellipse was for you) I have not taught my kids how to use a seafood fork or how to greet the Queen of England when you meet her at a party, but I have taught them that your tip is calculated on the full price, not the half price, of your appetizers unless the service is really, really, bad, in which case you adjust accordingly. Does this say anything about my socioeconomic status, my social class, my lack of class, or what? Tonight when I go to Goodwill I will see if they have any seafood forks, so I can cover that lesson next. (What does a seafood fork look like, does anyone know?)

Laptops, cheap.

Hola, amigos! (I know a second language! No, a third language! No, a FOURTH language! Wait! I know LOTS of languages—English, Finnish, Latin, pigLatin, Spanish. That should make me good and employable. Wait! I’m not looking for a job! Forget all that! And forget all the exclamation marks! Don’t you know that’s bad style?!)

Daddy-O has invented a new laptop that you can make on your very own home computer. That’s right. Just download laptop, send it to your printer, and in two minutes you will have in your hands a brand spanking new, never-used, not-refurbished laptop computer. And a nice supply of mice to go with it. (You will need the mice, because there is no touch pad on the keyboard, but our mice are wireless, so they are easy to transport, easy to use, and they will fit in your back pocket.) The most amazing part of this new technology is the ON-OFF control: just fold your laptop in half, and when you close it, it’s OFF. Open it and it’s ON. Wow. Computing can’t get any simpler than that. Actually, the MOST amazing thing about this new technology is the price: each one costs just pennies! And I’m not trying to trick you here; a new Dell costs pennies, too—45,000 of them, but ours are truly cheap. Just go dig around under your sofa cushions, and you should be able to find enough spare change to pay for one of OUR laptops for every person in your family, if not for every person in your whole entire neighborhood (anyone hearing echoes of Junie B. Jones? Check out my Book Bag.) Print the Most Disposable model on printer paper. Print the Less Disposable model on card stock. Flip the laptop over and decorate it with crayons, markers, stickers, chocolatey fingerprints, pictures cut out of magazines—VOILA! Your own custom skin! Wowee wow wow. I think that takes care of all of my Christmas shopping.

Speaking of mice: the five-year-old has been watching the research and development process for this fantabulous new computer, and was one of the first to test the prototype. So she was first in line this morning to demand a mouse to go with it. “Daddy! Come make me a mouse!” she yelled.

“How about I make some puuroa instead?” he yelled back. What? Did he think she wanted MOUSE for breakfast?

Sauna. That’s SOW-nah.

Do not say SAH-nah. I am a self-respecting Finn, and if you say SAH-nah, I will know that you are a naive tourist, and I will feel the need to educate you.

Elaborating on muesli

For your information, muesli is spelled m-u-e, not m-e-u. Let that be a lesson to me to spell-check before I post.

And now, after quick research at Wikipedia, I am even more informed. Raw oats contain phytic acid (didn’t we all know that we need phytic acid?), which is removed from quick oats. So, use old-fashioned oats instead, and let your muesli sit (or stand, whatever the case may be) a bit longer. And put some nuts in or on it if you wish. And use plain yogurt to cut down on the sugar, if you can stand it. I can’t.

Another technological marvel, and muesli for breakfast

I am scheduling this post to be published tomorrow morning (another cool option for blogging). So if you wake up bright and early and hope to have something new to read from mommyloon, you won’t be disappointed.

How about a little something to pose as a recipe for your breakfast?

Mommyloon’s Simple Muesli

1 serving vanilla yogurt (that would be 4-6 ounces)
3-4 tablespoons quick-cooking oats
1/2-1 banana, sliced (How much do you like bananas, anyway? If you don’t, at all, use another kind of fruit or none at all.)

Stir oats into yogurt, and let stand 1/2 hour or so, to let the oats soften. (Or should we let it sit? If your yogurt is fatigued, let it sit, otherwise make it stand. This muesli may be simple, but lazy, no.)  Or, cover and refrigerate overnight. Stir in banana slices. Yummy.

What I remember from our tenth anniversary trip to Hawaii is the windsurfers, the giant frog that chased Daddy-O up the stairs, and the muesli on the breakfast buffet. Plus I remember my swimsuit was a size 6.

 

The family bed

There were five in the bed and the little one said, “Roll over! Roll over!” So they all rolled over, and the mom groaned, “Get off my legs and go in your own bed; there’s not enough room in here for all of us.”

There were four in the bed, and the little one said, “Roll over! Roll over!” So they all rolled over, and the dad sat up and said, “I may as well get up. I’m not getting any sleep.”

There were three in the bed and the little one said, “Roll over! Roll over!” So they all rolled over, and the mom yelped, “Quit using my head for a pillow! Go ask your dad to pour you some Cheerios.”

There were two in the bed and the little one said, “Aaah! Waah!” (Roll over, roll over.) So the mom yelled, “Someone come get this baby!”

There was one in the bed, and the mom said, “…” (We don’t know what she said. We hope she had five minute’s peace before they all came back to join her.)

Cool new technology

I am becoming ever more technologically literate, and learning to blog via email. This is of no interest to you.